If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
is wine microwaveable?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
