I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
