he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
