: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
