i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
