saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
