just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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