Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
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