She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
