i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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