how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
