Yo dont text me then not text me
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
