problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I need to align my fucking chakras
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
