I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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