OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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