Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
