I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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