why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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