He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Randomize
