Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
