they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
