windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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