doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize