I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
