That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize
