i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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