In the future we'll all be gay
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
