i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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