During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
