the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
