its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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