Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
