i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
