i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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