go do what you do best...puke behind churches
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
