At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
