Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
