Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
This is the prime rib incident all over again
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
