I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
handjob tips. give me some.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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