Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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