she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
As shirtless as possible
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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