i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
