the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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