So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
