Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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