The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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