And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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