I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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