Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
