i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
